The psyche weaves the solutions to our life problems into our dreams. Dreams are the “thoughts of the heart” (Ann Faraday). Dreams are an expression of wisdom from the depths of our personality.

Three dream examples:

A middle-aged man had the following recurring dream: “I’m climbing around on the roof and suddenly become scared of falling.” –

A divorced woman was upset by her recurring dream of many years that she was being followed by men. –

Another successful and social businessman’s repeating dream was of wandering through lonely, grey streets looking for friends.

Is it coincidence that these people always dreamt about the same things again and again? In psychological counselling and dream interpretation it was shown that these clients’ dreams were closely related to their personalities and life circumstances:

The first male dreamer (he was scared to fall down from the roof in his dream) had lost his emotional grounding due to his excessive rationality and consequently developed a feeling of insecurity in life. The woman (she was pursued by men in her dream) had not yet fully processed her conflicts with her ex-husband. She still had a lot of aggressive feelings towards this man. The third dreamer, the successful businessman (in the dream he wandered the lonely streets) was, in reality, a lonely man.

Our dreams indicate our problems and unresolved conflicts that we do not consciously perceive. Verena Kast says: “Dreams can jolt us and bring us to look at a life circumstance through the dream’s eye. There aren’t any bad dreams, but dreams that by all means upset and alarm us; dreams that we can’t forget; dreams that want to tell us something. Thus our dreams can be like sign posts which let us know which way to go.”

A further example of a dream from the realm of sexuality:

A woman wrote in a forum: "In my dream I was having sex with my boss all night long with my husband watching from a distance. The dream is not unpleasant as I have a very nice boss and get along with him well. I have relatively healthy sexual relations with my husband, although we often argue. I’m not really lacking sex. What does this dream mean?”

A male member of the forum thus answered this dreamer: “What should a dream mean? I’ve already dreamt so much trash – as if that meant anything in real life! Then I would have already been killed by somebody several times and I don’t even feel that I’m being pursued!”

Should dreams only have no significance just because we don’t understand them right away or because they irritate us? – Or must we learn to understand the language and symbols in our dreams in order to understand their messages?

Another member in the forum, a woman, made a first guess at the significance of this sexual dream and wrote: “This dream doesn’t have to have a deep, disturbing significance. Perhaps it was just a wet dream. Or it isn’t even about sex, but about power and advancing your career. If it really interests you to find out what’s going on inside of you, then you should begin therapy, where your inner feelings will be analysed.”

Even people who believe that they don’t dream can get to know their dreams and the power that they have.

What do you have to do?

1.     Decisively demand that your dreams come to you shortly before falling asleep!

2.     Make arrangements so that you can write down your dreams immediately either in the middle of the night or in the morning just after waking up.

3.     Write down everything in the morning just after waking, even if it seems incomprehensible and fragmentary.

4.     Collect your dreams and keep a dream diary!

How can you understand your dreams? You can talk with an understanding friend about your dreams. If you frequently have dreams about fear or a burdensome, depressing dream, this is an indication that you should go into psychological counselling or therapy. These dreams can indicate unresolved personal conflicts. A counsellor or therapist can work together with you to help you decipher the messages in your dreams.

Basic principles in dream interpretation and analysis

We as counsellors and therapists must get to know and understand aspects of your biography and your present life circumstances. Dreams can not be understood solely with the help of a dream symbol dictionary. Each dream symbol – for example animals, houses, cars, people, etc. can only be interpreted when seen in relation to an individual personality and set within the circumstances of the dreamer’s life and conflicts. The significance of many dreams is not accessible immediately and we often need many dreams and discussions in order to understand them. We don’t have to fully understand every dream. Spending time analysing your dreams will promote your sensitivity and self-healing process. Dream analysis doesn’t seek to manipulate you. The dreamer alone decides which interpretation is correct. Deep inside, you know the meaning of your dreams!

Three important dream theories and basic methods for dream interpretation

1. Dream interpretation according to Sigmund Freud and classic psychoanalysis

According to classic psychoanalysis our dream images show us our unconscious, suppressed drives and desires. Suppressed sexual desires and aggressions are the energies stirred by dream-work. These drives and desires have to be encoded through symbols and dream images so that the dreamer doesn’t become conflicted due to moral norms. A dream example from psychotherapy: A woman reports to her therapist: “In my dream I’m being followed by a broomstick that looks like it has a rosy pink balloon on the top of it. It attacks me and I push the broomstick back.” The broomstick is a clear phallic symbol for the psychoanalyst. In fact this client had great problems allowing her sexual needs to surface in day-to-day life. In her dream she also resists a sexual symbol.

2. Dream interpretation according to C. G. Jung

According to C. G. Jung, the dream serves as compensation to our emotional imbalance. If one is too concentrated on one area in life, the dream offers a realm in which the other, suppressed parts of our personalities become active. Example of a dream from psychotherapy: A client feels helplessly caught in the endless pressure to work harder for his company. He dreams: “I’m part of a social circle. It has been decided that my boss will be killed by hanging. I don’t understand it and leave. I don’t want to watch it. I want to save my boss.” This dream shows the client that he has identified himself too strongly with values and obligations associated with work and fulfilling work related duties. The boss in his dream is not his real-life boss, but a symbol that represents a characteristic of the dreamer’s own personality which has been too highly developed – namely a symbol of his addiction to work. The message: the dreamer should rid himself of his excessive inner pressure to work as it is making him sick. Dreams must frequently employ such drastic images in order to jolt some people (into action).

The dream also has a “prospective-concluding function” according to C. G. Jung: Visions for the person’s future development become evident in dreams. The same man who wanted to kill his boss, dreamt a bit later: I open the door of a transport. A heavy sack is lying on a valuable guitar. Dream interpretation: The heavy sack symbolises the burdens and obligations of the work world. The image of the guitar indicates that the client still has hidden, suppressed creative talents that he can discover and then develop in real life.

3. Dream interpretation in Gestalt therapy

Dream interpretation according to Gestalt therapy is also focused, like that of C. G. Jung, on the claim that dreams serve as a means to confront the fact that we have alienated our lives from our true selves. The message of many dreams is that we should balance out our personalities. Suppressed personality characteristics, talents, ideas, life goals and interests should be encouraged and brought to life. This isn’t only about sexuality and aggressions as in classical psychoanalysis, but involves a much wider spectrum of personality traits. The distinctive feature of psychological dream therapy is that role-playing is used as a means of dream interpretation. Ann Faraday has demonstrated this method with many examples.

© Dipl.-Päd. Jürgen Bendszus 2010. All rights reserved.

Titel of the original German text: Bedeutung und Sinn unserer Träume

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